My school has sent more people to Isis than Oxbridge

Isobel Cockerell
Isobel Cockerell  /  Leave a Comment

A few months ago thousands of Oxbridge hopefuls got their rejection letters. Their dreams forged in cold stone and manicured lawns, musty libraries and earnest chatter were dashed in one fell swoop by the cruel and discerning hand of the admissions tutor. Proportionately few applicants will have been state-educated. The Oxbridge admissions system is, as we know, bloated by candidates from …


We offered 14 dead white men blowjobs and these were their reactions

The Stepford Student  /  2 Comments

I looked up from the dusty innards of some old tome - a treatise on 15th century natural philosophy, I think, but I wasn’t really concentrating. William was absorbed in whatever he was reading. I stared at him intently. He didn’t notice. I got up from my chair and trod delicately across the wooden floor of the library until I was right behind him.

‘Hey,’ I breathed, ‘want a blowjob?’

He turned to look at me, and this was his face.